Ass, Shit & Conforming...

Some random thoughts that have been stuck in my head for a little while. I thought I would share. Please feel free to add to this stream of thought or correct my course as you feel led.

I have often wondered what exactly defines 'coarse' or 'obscene' language.

Ephesians 5:4
Colossians 3:8

Who gets to define what words can be used and what words are inappropriate? What is the true goal of these scriptures? More recently I listened to the following sermon:
http://gracelifepulpit.media.s3.amazonaws.com/SC-2009-03-06-PJ.mp3
(Pornification of the Pulpit)

Based mainly on Titus 2:7-8

So all these got my brain flowing, and basically resulted in the following:

1. I don't really understand how some words are ok based on their usage and others are not. The two examples are Ass or Jackass vs Shit. I have friends, and know many in my church that won't let their kids say Ass (at anytime really,) but they can sing it in church if we sing the right hymnal. However shit is never ok, even if your talking about taking a shit. Or stepping in horse shit. Etc...

If a non-believer heard an entire congregation singing about an ass, would they still think of it as a 'bad word'? Does it matter if its in context or not? Going even a bit further, both piss and damn are considered obscene by many (who I assume don't use a king james bible.) Would it be wrong to read verses out loud about those that 'pisseth on the wall' and 'damnation'? Would this be 'coarse'? Obscene? Would reading Song of Solomon out loud be obscene?

2. As best I can tell, our list of 'bad words' is nothing more than accepted norms for a society. What becomes difficult for me is when I consider this against Romans 12:2

Now I know this verse is not directly related to how and what we say, but I have a difficult time understanding how we filter our speech based on the 'world' (our society) while not 'conforming to this world'.

I do not want to be a potty mouth, and to be honest I wouldn't say these words out loud. I said ass two weeks ago, and spelled shit. Too many visits with a bar of soap I guess. But what are we striving for? What is sound speech? How do we avoid 'conforming to this world'?

I am not trying to rationalize anyone's usage of certain words. I just want to better understand scripture. I enjoyed the sermon I posted above, but I am probably on a very different page than that preacher. I personally think God cares a great deal more about our hearts than specific words but then I'm confronted by things like 'sound speech' and my head just begins to spin.

Am I the only one?

Drink, Mourn, Grow

Like a raging thunderstorm your word approaches.
Light drizzle grows into a sheet of glass stretching from heaven to earth.
And the thirsty land celebrates.
The storm continues.
We drink.

Lightning illuminates ominous clouds like a camera’s flash.
A large field ignites into dance.
Yellow, orange and blue melt into white.
The fire is raging.
We mourn.

Scorched earth lives among the quenched.
Destruction mingles with restoration.
The rain’s punches subside and the lightning ceases.
The storm is ending.
We grow.